The person I normally am, I no longer know,
Self inflicted wounds merely from agony of thoughts,
If I continue to dwell in the past I'm sure all I have is lost.
Pleading to release all that sits on my heart,
A mountain of contemplation imprints on the soul.
Seeing your face as you thought on his name,
Made me wonder when I'm not around will you ever do the same.
Images replayed over again in my mind,
Praying for amnesia just for this time.
My foolishness distorts my mind, taking me hostage,
Yet falling into temptation to nurture these misleading seeds,
Asking "Why" only helps these things grow.
Asking "Who" only makes us cold,
Asking "When" only takes me deeper still,
Into a bed of frustrations my mind seeks to escape.
Setting myself up, I peeked into self induced visions,
Threatening to destroy everything, don't give it voice.
I know it's wrong, but gravity pulls me to this direction.
Often falling for well laid traps.
Searching for a solid rock where I can stand.
As confidence erodes beneath my feet,
Pulling me with a tide of regret.
My strength, now turned weakness,
Now the worse of me is no longer in the past.
And to that end I should never have asked,
But I'm in my feelings, but I can't let her know.
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